Sillyness

Hey folks!

So I'm studying my Certificate Three in Children's Services and I'm on placement at the moment. I also work in Childcare as an Unqualified.

At work I've been left many, many times with a dozen or more kids for fair amounts of time, on placement under no circumstances am I to be left alone with any child. There's not a lot of point to saying that it just amuses me that the only thing that has changed is my label.

On the other hand because most students have had no experience with children (why would you pay upfront for a course working with kids if you had never spent any time with kids I don't know) and need to be prompted to do everything like sit with the children and play. I am getting constant praise for how amazing I am which is good for the self esteem.

That's all. Kind of boring I know.

Here's a pretty butterfly I made at http://www.amnesty.org.au/comfort.

Links for the ages.

• Attack Turtle
• Ye Olde Google Charts Directions for Columbus' First Trip
• If 'Twilight' Was 10 Times Shorter And 100 Times More Honest
• Redneck woman rails on Barack Obama
• "What could be more festive than a cross covered in fuzzy Christmas lights?"
• Aretha's Hat: The True Story
• Would You Do That If Barack Was Watching
• Kari Byron | Pregnancy Magazine
• Mary Carey’s New Porno Spoofs Celebrity Rehab
• One miserable childhood
• Hand silkscreened giant condom pillow with giant fabric condom by LittleElk
• No Exit Strategy Whatsoever
• Oh, This is Acceptable
• Remember The Plane That Landed in the Hudson?
• Translating the Untranslatable
• Why cats fail to grasp string theory
• Red Sex, Blue Sex
• Everything Tracy Jordan Said

Celebrity Rehab Australia

I love Celebrity Rehab and Sober House. It may be the greatest show on television and if I have kids I am sitting them down and making them watch it. You think drugs are cool? Here's Steven Adler trying to use a computer. Still wanna use?

Well it now appears that Andrew Symonds is done with cricket and I was thinking about what he could do with himself. And I think Celebrity Rehab Australia is the answer.

We need about 9 people a nice mix of addictions, sexes and careers and a reputable doctor to host it.

So far I have:
Andrew Symonds
Ben Cousins
Jodi Gordon

Maybe Matthew Newton could slip up and choke another soapie star.

Ideas please...

A Brief timeline of fuck-ups at the Adelaide Zoo

Opened in 1883 the Adelaide Zoo is a beautiful (if outrageously expensive) place.
I remember having to stand well back from the lion's cage as the male lion tended to spray large groups of school children, I never saw the elephant Samorn in her (his?) glory days, he was pretty old and crazy by the time I saw it (he used to pull children around the zoo on a cart and enjoyed it but that had to be stopped because it was cruel so then he spent all his time in the concrete enclosure, til some bright spark decided to take him up to a special elephant enclosure at Monarto where he would have tons of room and live in his "natural environment" of course by that time Samorn was so used to his Elephant House the wide open spaces at Monarto terrified the poor thing and it died shortly after being moved.)

With the news today of an Orangutan escaping from its enclosure, and the Rhino that escaped from Monarto a few months ago I thought I would take you through some of the infamous moments at the zoo.

In 1902 a man was "lacerated in a frightful fashion" by a lion.
In 1920 a keeper's arm was ripped off by a polar bear.
In 1985 two teenagers broke in and killed 64 animals at the petting zoo.
In 2002 16 guinea pigs were killed in a break-in.
In 2004 a monkey was stolen in the "first such case in the zoo's history"
They may have waited 120-odd years for the first case of animal theft but they only had to wait 2 years for the second, and only a few months for a third. In 2006 a meercat was stolen in April and some rare parrots in December.
Then of course Adelaide went from stealing birds to bashing them which pissed me off slightly.

Does this kind of thing happen all over the world? I know people get into enclosures and eaten like that stupid German woman but I'm not aware of a great deal of animal stealing I think that might just be us.

p.s. Dear China, we still want the Pandas please.

I'm moving to America!

I've been planning it for a while, years actually. I was born in San Diego (not sure if you all know that), I left when I was 4 but I still have US citizenship so I've wanted to go back there and live for a while before I start to get bogged down with things like husbands and jobs and children.

So I leave on September 5th and I have a place to stay in San Francisco for exactly 1 week, I have exactly zero job.

If you have any suggestions email me or leave a comment, if you have any spare money hit the donate button on the sidebar. (You don't have to donate but if you do I will love you forever)

Thanks!